Aggression is a common phase toddlers go through, and it’s a difficult issue for parents to deal with.
If it’s any consolation, know that, as a parent, you’re not alone in facing this problem and that most kids will act out in this manner at some point.
Nanny Robina explains that children aren’t behaving in a mean-spirited way — they’re too young to really understand that what they’re doing, whether it’s biting, hitting, or scratching, is hurting the other person.
"Children are not mean or vindictive at that age," she notes, adding that the way to deal with it is by "constantly telling them that this is wrong."
Robina suggests observing your child to see what’s triggering them to get to that stage of aggression. Are they arguing with another child over a toy or what television show to watch? Are they trying to get your attention? If the latter, it’s important that you be careful how you approach the situation.
"If you give them too much attention they could continue doing it just because you give them attention for it," Robina advises.
In fact, Robina suggests focusing your attention first on the child that’s been bitten or scratched. Be there with hugs and support. Then turn to the child that was the aggressor, come down to their level, and in a firm voice tell them what they’ve done was wrong and give them a time-out.
Avoid biting back as a way to teach your child that biting hurts. If the lesson is that biting is bad behaviour, you shouldn’t be doing it yourself. As Robina says, "two wrongs don’t make a right."
Rather, the key is being consistent in your reaction each time your child acts out in this way.
"You have to be very consistent. You’re not going to see results overnight. Children will do it. You’ll be relieved to know this is a stage they go through," she says.
"But they do need guidance, because if you don’t guide them, they could continue to do it through school and that’s how you end up with a little bit of a bully on your hands if you don’t nip it in the bud."